Everyone is all jazzed up about the potential return to .500 for the Mets. One House Money Game win, and they are there. This team continues to fly below the radar and find ways to win. It is fun to watch.
However, I am slightly cranky this morning because of this potential landmark.
My very talented and intelligent friend Tom shared a piece on May 29th pretty much laying out how the Mets could go 9-5 in their next 14 games finding themselves back to .500. If the Mets win tonight, they will hit that 9-5 mark.
Pretty kick ass right?
There is a down side to this for me. You see, while writing for Mets Gazette Tom and I participated in a friendly “recap pennant race”. Basically, we took turns writing recaps for the Gazette and we tracked how well the Mets did for each of our recaps.
Every time he won he loved to let me know about it. In case you haven’t figured it out, I’m pretty much a guy’s guy so a little shit talking is always welcomed. No problem.
Well, it seems as if Tom has gone off the deep end with his latest success. The minute the Mets won yesterday I knew I’d hear something from him, but he decided to bring it to a whole new level in the form of about 23 voice mails and 73 text messages letting me know he is the next Nostradamus.
I had the Midwestropolitan Research Staff transcribe a few of them for you for shits and giggles.
5:30pm EST: “Dude, can you believe the Mets are one win away from going 9-5 just like I predicted?”
5:40 pm EST: “I’m the shit.”
5:43 pm EST: “Because I have predicted that the Mets would get back to .500 after this series in case you couldn’t put two and two together.”
5:44 pm EST: “Tell Carlos I said hi. And let him know that I am “winning”!”
6:15 pm EST: “Chris and I are going to go celebrate my epic winningness. Wine coolers and Long Island Ice Teas for everybody!”
*The Chris he is referring to is Mets pitcher Chris Young. Ever since he sampled Tom’s upside down pineapple cake the two of have been inseparable. Due to being placed on the DL for the year, they have been spending quite a bit of time together.
Tom used to be a beer drinker, but Chris is the one that introduced him to wine coolers and long island ice teas. I’m pretty sure Tom is in the process of having his man card revoked.
9:30pm EST: “Well on the road to being wasted. I just had my third wine cooler in about three hours. Chris just threw up in the Taco Bell drive through. I told him he shouldn’t have had that second Long Island.”
9:45 pm EST: “How come you’re not replying? Probably pissed that I called these last 14 games. I understand, it’s hard being around greatness for some people.”
10:30 pm EST: “Shit. Chris fell while we were playing pool. I think he broke something. Who gets injured playing pool?”
1:00 am EST: “Just got back from the Emergency room. Chris did break his leg. He also tore a ligament in his other arm so he’ll have to have Tommy John surgery on that one too.”
1:10 am EST: “Oh well. At least I predicted the Mets would be .500 after these last 14 games.”
1:30 am EST: “Just got out of the shower. Thought you may have called. Ever happen to you? Call me and we’ll talk about it.”
And that ladies and gentlemen, is my friend Tom.
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Tags: The dangers of binge drinking wine coolers and long island ice teas.
June 13, 2011 at 1:40 pm |
Unmitigated lies. We weren’t playing pool. We were playing IN the pool.
At least transcribe correctly. You lose your credibility pulling stunts like this…
June 13, 2011 at 2:28 pm |
HAHAHA Hilarious!! “Just got out of the shower, thought you may have called.” haha